By Alex Baad
Let’s get one thing straight. The Drunk Munchies, affectionately known as the Drunchies, is a serious problem that affects thousands of students on this campus every weekend. When the Drunchies strike, our animal instincts kick in and we find the nearest food to devour. You can sometimes find something edible in your house to snack on (or you might significantly lower your standards because you’re too lazy to leave your house), but the most satisfying Drunchies cures can be found on the streets of Ann Arbor. No matter where you are in Ann Arbor there is usually drunk food somewhere nearby, but not all drunk food is created equal. So, throughout my three years at Michigan, I have been on a mission to find the best drunk food in town. My criteria includes superior taste, competitive value, and an effective cure to my Drunchies.
**I will admit I am a little biased because many of the classic drunk food restaurants are too far away from where I live, which for me is an immediate disqualifier. Therefore, I am only going to look at restaurants that are near the intersection of State and Packard, so for all the South U Pizza, Backroom Pizza and Pancheros fans, I am sorry in advance.**
When it comes to taste my two favorites are the Wolverine Burrito at Get Some Burritos and the Double Cheeseburger at Quickie Burger. Where a lot of Tex-Mex restaurants such as BTB and Pancheros offer very similar items, the Wolverine Burrito at Get Some Burritos is a large beef burrito with the crafty addition of French Fries. Some people think that adding more starch to a burrito is crazy, but the Wolverine Burrito avoids this by replacing rice with the tasty French fries, so you don’t have to feel too guilty about chowing down on this delicious burrito. I think that the French fries add an additional greasiness aspect that is rarely seen with burritos, which I love. Meanwhile, the Double Cheeseburger at Quickie Burger is not only the only burger in close proximity but is also a pretty good burger compared to other burgers on campus (like the ones at Wendy’s.) In addition, they use whole grain buns, which in my opinion taste better and are healthier than white buns, so you can feel a little better about yourself after having just devoured a burger at 3 a.m. The sides at Quickie Burger (fries, nachos, mozzarella sticks, etc.) are also all very tasty and add to an already delicious burger experience.
The best values for drunk food can be found at Pizza Bob’s, Cottage Inn Pizza and BTB Burrito. Prices are similar between Pizza Bob’s and Cottage Inn, and with a medium pizza under ten dollars at each, you are unlikely to find a better deal for that size. BTB Burrito is another great option if you are trying to get the biggest bang for your buck. My personal favorite, the Chicken Fire and Ice, is a decently large sized burrito for only seven dollars. Seeing how it is one of the best and cheapest non-pizza options around, it is a great choice for anyone who is looking for something spicy that won’t hurt your wallet.
The most important factor for drunk food is how well it can cure the dreaded Drunchies. The best cures for me are the Wolverine Burritos and pizza from Cottage Inn. The Wolverine Burrito beats out other burritos due to its large size and its unique substitution of French fries, which allow for maximum fullness while not forfeiting taste. Cottage Inn Pizza just barely beats out Pizza Bob’s by having more options such as deep dish and multiple crust toppings. Not only will Cottage Inn pizza fill you up, but for all those who would typically leave over the crust, there are options to make the crust more delectable. Both of these options will surely leave you full and cured from even the worst case of the Drunchies.
When it comes to the best Drunchies cure near South State St and Packard, I believe that the best options are the Wolverine Burrito at Get Some Burritos and pizza at Cottage Inn Pizza. Both of these options are pretty tasty and are sure to fill you up. On top of that, Cottage Inn is a pretty good value and even though the Wolverine Burrito is a little more expensive than other burrito options, it makes up for it with amazing taste. While the Chicken Fire and Ice Burrito is a great value, it can sometimes be bland and won’t always fill you up. Additionally a Double Cheeseburger at Quickie Burger is one of the most flavorful foods in that area, but for the price you are paying you don’t really get enough substance to fill your empty pit. Purchasing a side there would get your total well over ten dollars, which is way too expensive for a drunken excursion, at least in my book.